Aah the joys of motherhood! Seeing your toothless bundle of joy grinning at you, the warm tender cuddles, the sweet sloppy kisses on the cheek, the milestones they achieve, and the unconditional love you receive. Motherhood is simply wonderful. Challenging? Yes. Is it tough? Yes. Sure, there’s some days I want to pull my hair out, or cry inside the closet. There are also days I feel as if I’m not fit to be a mother. Though overall, I would never reverse time. I really do, without a doubt, love it. And hearing my son say “MAH-MEE” is really one of the best feelings on Earth.
Before I became a mom, I had all these rules and expectations of how I was going to parent, and what type of mother I wanted to be. It’s crazy how almost 75% of those guidelines were almost never followed. Attempted, but never fully followed.
One of them was: I will not let having children “define” me. Meaning, just because I have a baby doesn’t mean I won’t have a life outside of being a mother or “lose” myself into motherhood. WRONG. The moment I became a mother, that was when I finally knew who I was. Holding the title of a public health officer or a health educator are my career goals. However, I feel as if it was a calling to be a mother. To tell you quite honestly, I never thought or knew that becoming a mother is who I am destined to be. Robert and I didn’t plan on having a baby just yet since we still had more to finish for our careers. But when the unexpected happened, we knew that it was God’s will. God had intended for this happen and it was part of His plan. That is why we named our son “Nathaniel”, it means “Gift from God”.
As I sit here writing this post, I am probably missing out on Girl’s Night Out and I can guarantee I have missed plenty more. However, I am not missing out on Nathan’s one hundredth performance on the song “Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes” and “Wheels on the Bus”. To be frank, I still wouldn’t mind hearing it 20 more times. Even though there are days I feel as if I need an escape from the chaos parenting can sometimes bring, I know where my heart lies. And it’s with my family.
In my opinion, motherhood has molded me to become a better person, so that I can be a role model for Nathan and our future children. It has often times tested my patience to it’s limit, but it has created more room for patience to be learned. It has brought out a lot of love and affection that is different from romance that I have never felt and knew of. It has also brought out the best of me in ways that can only be expressed through kindness and unselfishness. At times, motherhood can be lonely, but it has also shown me who my genuinely true friends are. As well as, the family members I can truly rely on. Motherhood has not weighed me down, or make me feel “old”. Instead it has uplifted me to create bigger and more realistic goals and aspirations.
It has changed my body physically, but now I have a body that I am more confident and happier in. A body that has made me feel proud because I brought new life into this Earth, and have produced sustenance for my child.
I am not ashamed to be a mother, and most especially, I am not ashamed that I am a stay-at-home-mom. Though I’m not financially contributing to my family (for now), I know I am enriching foundation for my son. To me, that is an accomplishment and something I am very proud of. I may be missing out on hanging out with my girlfriends, or the opportunity to finish graduate school before I turn 30. Or, seeing the Eiffel Tower or visiting Greece before 40, but, you what, there’s still plenty of time for that. It doesn’t have to be now, and that is A-okay. When the time comes, I get to celebrate the accomplishment of obtaining my masters degree and perhaps even celebrating that accomplishment in Europe. That sounds WAY better.
I will never change my outlook on motherhood. I highly praise every mother, for the hard work, sacrifice, and dedication they bestow. I will never have doubts, regrets, or dissatisfaction. The Lord has brought me everything I need to fulfill my happiness. This is me, this is who I am, and what I love.
the list continues…
And you know what? I wouldn’t change a damn thing.
Raise your hand if you agree.
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